Before you start reading this, I want you all to know that I’m better now. I’ve been taking my meds everyday and so I don’t wanna scare anybody or give the impression that I’m some kind of loony or some kind of crazy fuck. I’m just a normal guy who went thru a psychotic episode while serving in the military and now wants to share his experience.
So how crazy was I? Well for starters I was hearin voices..in my head and it wasn’t the voice of reason. It was other people’s voices. Talkin to me, conversatin to me like a frickin myspace. It was telling me things..things that made me doubt myself, lose self-confidence, and all in all just hate myself. And it gets crazier. I thought I could telepathically communicate with people. I could hear their thoughts and they could hear mine and we would communicate telepathically. It was like some X-Men shit. Or so it seemed. And guess who’s voice I heard that got me all excited? Jessica Alba. She was tellin me that she loved me and that she wanted to come see me. So then I check in to the Holiday Inn at San Diego cuz that’s where she wants to meet. I check in to my room and she’s not there and I’m like wtf. Im thinkin she went to go out and go shopping. So I go outside and take a cab. But instead of goin to the plaza to look for her, I tell the driver to take me to a strip club. So when we pull up to the strip club the driver asks for the money. This whole time I’m thinkin I’m in a reality TV show so I should make things interesting for the viewers. So I’m thinkin I should ditch the cab. So I’m in the back seat thinking if I should do this or not. But in a brief turn of events my morals kick in so I don’t ditch the cab. Booo. I know. Kinda anti-climactic isn’t it. Instead I tell him to take me back to the hotel. So I don’t even go to the strip club.
Back in the hotel, I make eye contact with these Asian girls working at the front desk. I’m thinkin they wanna have sex. So I go up to my room, strip down to my boxers and lie under the sheets. I leave the door open cuz I’m planning on them walkin thru the door ready to get the “business”. So im lying there all excited for like an hour or two waiting for them. They never come. I’m like what happen? So im like whatever fuck it and instead I order some porn. The next morning I wake up feeling unsuccessful and moded. I check out and head back to my base.
Back at base, I exhibit some bizarre behavior. I begin to isolate myself and not talk to anyone. I begin to start screaming and laughing for no apparent reason. I almost get charged for sexual harrassment for grabbin my co-worker’s ass.(The charges later gets dropped and i get excused for it cuz basically “i went schizo wit da bitch yo”). Cpl. Pitts begins to worry and decides to take me to a doctor.
At the medical center, they begin to ask me all types of questions. They ask me “Where do u see urself in 5 years?” And I reply “With Jessica Alba in a mansion.” They ask me “What do u wanna do when u get out of the Marines?” I say “I wanna play ball with Michael Jordan.” Not that I was tryna be funny, I was seriously being honest. Well I obviously fail their test. So they take me to this one room and I see like 5 Marines sitting down and I start thinking “Holy Shit! Im about to get raped!” So I bolt out the room and everyone starts holding me down, pinning me to the ground and Cpl Pitts asks me “What’s wrong?” And like a frightened child I say, “Cpl. Pitts I won’t do it ever again. Please don’t do this to me.” Cpl. Pitts says, “What are u talkin about?” And I just repeatedly tell him “I’m sorry. I won’t do it again. I didn’t know.” Well basically I thought I was being punished for reading people’s minds and harrassing them with my thoughts. Well to make the long story short, they give me some meds and then they ship my ass to the psyche ward. The End.
